How Absent Fathers Impact Our Adult Relationships

“Part of the work is to get real with ourselves and to be real with our own history.”

When you’re able to do that, then you’re able to get into the fourth stage of love, which I call Real Lasting Love. And what that looks like is: It’s real. I’m with a real person. They’re not perfect, and I’m not perfect. But when I’m able to really be myself, I feel securely attached because I’m not fearing that they’re going to leave me.

We’re always, in a sense, looking for love in all the wrong places. But when you’re starting to look for love in the right places, the sex gets really good, too. If it was already good, it gets better. There is security and real ease, there is a lot more humor, there’s a lot more fun, and there’s a lot more joy.

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